Hey all, I'm live to you from the BoltBus between New York City and Boston. Kim and I took in a good portion of the game before we had to get ready and get my ass out of Philadelphia. I'm good and ready to give you some caveats before heading into the playoffs, but first, we just wanted to let everyone know:
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Anyway, at the end of this, it's pretty obvious that the Islanders feel kinda like this:
Sidney Crosby went into this game a goal behind Ovechkin and Stamkos. He left the game with the (largely meaningless) Rocket Richard--but hey, it's basically the only major award he hasn't yet won in the realm of hockey, so why the fuck not?
What a player.
Forgotten in all of this bullshit with the Rocket Richard Trophy is that Crosby pulled off a 5-point night in order to tie Alexander Ovechkin for second in scoring this season. Three more points and he'd have shared the Art Ross, too. But, as is, he only has to share with one man, and that man is Brother Steven. Like so:
We love all of these individual accomplishments, these one-man efforts.
Eric Godard had one hell of a night, scoring some kind of workingman's goal and also fighting a motherfucker:
Expect some kind of amazing post from Travis at THE GOON BLOG about Eric Godard as we get ready to view the rest of his suit collection as the playoffs settle in.
Mike Rupp also had a fight but we're not really sure if we should describe it as a fight or some bizarre interpretive dance inspired by The Pirate Ship at Kennywood:
Moving on. . .
Oh have we mentioned how much sex Jordan Leopold deserves?
Answer: all of it.
A good note to end the regular season on.
And you all delivered:
Nicole G
Kaitlin
It's a wonderful world.
Steiggy and Errey had a "let's name the Ottawa Senators entire roster" party somewhere there in the first period, so we know what we're up against on Wednesday.
These are your matchups.
And your playoff schedule.
The first round will also be on FSN Pittsburgh.
Can you feel it?
Let's rock it out.
GO PENS.
Sunday, April 11, 2010
travel day and sharing
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17 comments:
Oh, it's business time.
Paging Mr. Stamkos: Пустые сетевики не рассчитывают, douchebag!
Translation: Empty netters don't count, douchebag!
Oh wait - isn't this deja vu? But didn't I yell it at another douchebag who recently "scored" an empty netter? I hate repeating myself but sometimes I can't hardly stand it.
When Steigy & Errey kept announcing Chachi's shifts as the third period ticked toward its conclusion, they pointed out that there was a good chance he'd have a shot at an empty goal, as well. I laughed aloud. Then I countered: "I love you guys, but do you seriously believe he'd go for 52 on an empty net? Wouldn't that be like oh I dunno, stealing?" He's just not made that way. It wouldn't have felt right. It would have also stung if his 52nd had happened in a shootout; technically, he wouldn't have received "credit" for it, but at least he would have symbolically earned the goal fair and square.
As far as I'm concerned, Stamkos' 51st is stinky and dirty. He needs to wash his wiener and think about what he's done. And disappear until next season. Thank you very much.
And how fitting that the Pimp of Pimps, Eric Godzilla, scored his first goal today. It wasn't his "51st" but your first time should fucking count for something! Especially when you're EG. What a sick way to kick off the playa-offs. I have scoped out three porn flicks I want to send him for good luck, but I'm not sure which one he'll like best. Can you bitches help me out?
Porn Flick 1 = All Azz in Aspen
Description: "Horny sluts spend cold nights with warm meat between their legs."
Porn Flick 2 = Barefoot Fetish
Description: "Beautiful girls bare their soles for nasty sex games."
Porn Flick 3 = Amateur POV Pervs
Description: "Perv sluts get faces full of filth with POV poles."
I hope he has stuffed his Ottawa-bound baggage full of ostrich feather chapeaus, jugs of Remy Martin and clear heeled platforms. Canada Customs won't know what to make of him. :)
Can I just throw it out there that I hate how we blew a 3-goal lead in the course of, like, 5 minutes? I don't care that we played a game the night before, the Isles did, too, and Johnson was fresh. Letting in one wouldn't have been bad; letting three in was totally unacceptable.
But J.Leo deserves all the sex in the world for coming up HUGE these last few games. I feel like he deserves his own blingee for being fucking amazing.
Oh, and congrats to Chachi on the Richard. Really wish he didn't have to share it, though. Those empty netters suck - they're like claiming you won the race when you were the only one in your heat.
Umm...I did have something else to say...oh, right. Eric Tangradi. Please come crash my net.
Also, playoff matchups: 'Yotes v Wings is going to be good. I really hope Phoenix wins. I'm a sucker for underdog stories and they've sort of turned into my Western Conference babies. And Detroit just sucks. I will be watching as many of those games as I can; the time difference is a killer.
All right, think that's about it. Goon Blogger's right: it's business time. Can't wait for Wednesday!
fwiw, I love your blog. Especially your whimsical associations (MAF=kitteh was genius).
With or without over-sharing commentary, I hope you'll continue.
@MouthGuard: You are amazing.
@Goon Blogger: Business time, indeed.
Pens on Wednesday... Do it.
Ok, did anyone else lose their panties when Godsy sat down in the sin bin, took off his helmet and SHOOK HIS HAIR!!??? Am I seriously the only one who saw that? That man has so many gifts.
JLeo = HERO!!! He really did save the day but few will speak of him after what Cappy did.
I don't even know what to say about Sid . . . the man sees it . . . he aims for it . . . he GETS IT! Doesn't matter what "it" is. He needs to write a self-help book for the rest of us.
As much as I would have loved to see Sid get the Rocket by himself, I am still ok with Stevie getting the tie. A few reasons:
1) EVERYONE KNOWS that Stamkos got his 51st on an empty netter. Nuf said.
2) Stamkos is NOT a tool. I still think he's a good guy who works hard, plays clean and deserves good things so I will clap for him when he stands next to Sid in Vegas.
3) Thanks to KARMA and Timmy Thomas, Ovie got left behind!
And so goes the 2009-2010 NHL regular season . . . . let the battle begin.
BRING IT PENS!!!!!
So excited for the playoffs to start! My new neighbors unfortunately won't know what's coming...
JLeo has been amazing lately. Can't wait to see what he brings in the playoffs.
I'm kinda interested in seeing how Nashville does, only because all I ever hear about out here is the Blackhawks.
But, anyway...
Let's Go Pens!
@My Dearest Obsession: So true about the mind-blowing lead blowing thing. Every time I reached for another tortilla chip, the Isles scored again. It was weird. I'm just glad they hung on for the W. And "claiming you won the race when you were the only one in your heat" is an apt analogy for when somebody who is clearly capable of penetrating a properly defended net during regulation decides to just not expend the effort. NOT COOL. It's like having sex with somebody who passed out. It doesn't count.
Which is why my date to the NHL Awards will be Tyrone Biggums. Sure, he's a hot mess but he's a stand-up, honest-to-goodness crackie. And I know for sure that when I pass out, Tyrone's not gonna say he scored on me. And then put on a Tip Top Tailors clown suit, crash the stage and trample Chachi for a primo mic op. Tack!
May Doan & Co. swirlie Detoilet. May Philly (the "'Wit or 'Witout' Half Wits", as MouthWash calls them) poop on Jersey. And wouldn't it be hilarious if Colorado ate the Sharks in a sweep?
This is going to be fun! Extra fun because of all you bitches! :)
No this isn't my site but im a fan of it and am entitled to my own voice as long as i'm not posting inappropriate commentary.
Wrong. We run the site and therefore it is our right to manage the content and comments section as we see fit. Please stop ruining this for everyone else.
Am I the only one not insanely excited for the playoffs? Time to pull out the nerdiness, but I don't even want to think about life without hockey. And to be quite frank, my life becomes crazy during playoff hockey. I'm almost as bad as Bing when it comes to superstitions. Last year some of the more weird things I did was bake brownies because I imagined myself eating them when the Pens won Game 7 against the Capitals, wore shoes three sizes too small and were held together with duck tape, and my favorite was almost dying of heat stroke because I decided to wear all 10 of my Penguin shirts for Game 6 of the SCF. I am counting on this blog on keeping me sane.
P.S. I'm going to be missing our favorite #1 Senator killer :(
Inspired by the Pirate Ship at Kennywood = genius! Also, true.
I had an awesome time meeting you and meeting Kim for the first time ALL OVER AGAIN. Also, that picture of Rico Fata and myself will NEVER leave the internet and I hate it.
@Need Ice: Amen on all counts! Godard's hair, Chachi's work ethic (or whatever the hell you want to call it)...a self-help book would be greatly appreciated; everyone knows I need all the help I can get, lol.
@MouthGuard: I like your analogy much better. =]
I got a last-minute invitation to that game, from a family we know that has Isles season tickets. I got to see it with my Pens-loving "niece," who either wants to marry Crosby or take his job one day depending on her mood. We both squealed. I in fact squealed a lot, for all the reasons you describe, and literally had to communicate in sign the rest of the night since I had no voice! Not just our captain's 51st, but Godard's first! We really need to hold on to Jordan Leopold. What an awesome, awesome team.
BRING ON OTTAWA!!!! Also, apologies to everyone who's commented so far, but I can't cheer on the Coyotes anymore because that'll get my ass a one-way plane ticket back to Orlando. I would like to see snakes thrown on the ice alongside the octopi, though.
@The Goon Blogger: Actually thought of you a little after witnessing Godard's performance!
@ MouthGuard: Send 'em all. Godard will unfortunately have time to watch them, unless Chris Neil or somebody desperately needs to be put in his place.
@ MyDearestObsession: I hate how the Pens blew that lead, too. I'd like to think it's just because the Isles were super-motivated by pride and wanting to stay in the NHL next year and stuff, but I don't think that was the only factor. *sigh* Stamkos isn't going to the playoffs, and he made it clear he has no use for Ovechkin. I'm okay with it.
@ Rose: I plan on repeating my superstitions from last year, including wearing a special (kinda tacky) perfume on playoff game days, not eating or drinking anything red during games, and keeping a Crosby-scoring-a-goal wallpaper up on my work desktop.
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