Okay, so we need to have a little chit-chat here.
Gather round, boys.
NOT LIKE THAT NO, OH MY GOD CAN YOU PLEASE CONTAIN YOURSELVES?
Anyone?
Can you look here plz?
Okay, this will have to do.
*ahem*
First of all, we still love you. Don't ever think otherwise, because we always love you.
Now, let's talk about this game.
We know there are hard days in life.
Sidney, we know that finding out that Santa was really just your parents being sneaky as sugarplums danced through your sweet little head a room away was difficult for you.
Tyler, we know that the first time someone tried to convince you - incorrectly, yes, but still - that unicorns were not one of the creatures that Curry put on this great earth, you were distraught all evening.
Marc-Andre, we know that it was rough when you discovered that Hawaiian Punch was not 100% real fruit juice.
Eric, we won't even mention the Tooth Fairy.
So, boys, when you played your little hearts out and seemed to do everything right, we understand that it was hard when you had to see the Habs leave the ice smiling.
You deserved more than that.
You deserved to see Cammalleri's head roll.
Now, don't get me wrong. You have to finish. You have to tighten the D a bit. You have to make sure you are at the top of your game all of the time, not just "a lot" of the time.
But some days, the bounces just don't go your way and there's little you can do about it other than pray to Curry and hope things get better next time.
In closing, good hustle. Things will get better if you just keep pushing and tighten up your game just a touch. We're proud of you, and you will do better next time.
Mwah, mwah. Talk to you later, after we've spoken to a few individuals about what privileges will be taken away should they win again.
Okay, now, Penguins fans. Gather round and listen up.
Sir, that does not look like the Penguins-approved "vegas gold" on your face. We hope you're ready to back up that color choice with fists, if need be. Though we appreciate the selections of MAF and Tanger. Future Lemangs in the making are always heart warming.
Anyway, we just had a short talk with the boys and we thought we'd come out and say some words to you, too.
We know no one is too distraught over this loss. We played well and just got some bad bounces, right? It's just the Habs, right?
Well, right, but also very, very wrong.
As Penguins fans, we aren't used to facing the underdog. But think about it; the Habs are rocking a small fairy-tale situation here. Knocking out the Caps and the Pens would be basically the most amazing thing that the Habs could do. Almost like the 2008 Penguins reaching the Stanley Cup Finals.
Like the 2009 Penguins winning the Cup.
Now, of course, the Habs are nothing like the Penguins. But don't you ever forget underdog appeal. Shocking, yes, but we are no longer the underdog.
We're obviously going to win the Cup and we can never lose sight of that, but we can never start thinking that it is just going to be handed to us.
Watching the guys play a game like they just did and lose to the Habs should be an awakening to this fact.
So, wipe that frown off your face, little man, but don't start smiling just yet. Let's get a determined look on that face and head into this like any other battle.
Thank you, and goodnight.
Now, for you, press. We really do appreciate such hilarious photos as this:
It's funny, cute, and nostalgic all at once. Very similar to the famed Gill v. Chad Larose photo.
Stop puffing out your chest there, press. We'd like to have a word with you about such atrocities as this:
WHO DID YOU THINK LOOKED GOOD IN THIS PHOTO.
You can take the photo, but you do not have to release it to the general public.
It is playoffs time. The players should be worried about playing gracefully and with determination, not focusing on making sure you don't get the wrong shot.
General rule of thumb; If they'd untag it on facebook, don't publish it.
Thank you.
And you...you sir...
On Tuesday, we're getting out the scissors to snip the thin thread from which you hang.
Be afraid.
Be very afraid.
Go Pens.
Gather round, boys.
NOT LIKE THAT NO, OH MY GOD CAN YOU PLEASE CONTAIN YOURSELVES?Anyone?
Can you look here plz?
Okay, this will have to do.*ahem*
First of all, we still love you. Don't ever think otherwise, because we always love you.
Now, let's talk about this game.
We know there are hard days in life.
Sidney, we know that finding out that Santa was really just your parents being sneaky as sugarplums danced through your sweet little head a room away was difficult for you.
Tyler, we know that the first time someone tried to convince you - incorrectly, yes, but still - that unicorns were not one of the creatures that Curry put on this great earth, you were distraught all evening.
Marc-Andre, we know that it was rough when you discovered that Hawaiian Punch was not 100% real fruit juice.
Eric, we won't even mention the Tooth Fairy.
So, boys, when you played your little hearts out and seemed to do everything right, we understand that it was hard when you had to see the Habs leave the ice smiling.
You deserved more than that.
You deserved to see Cammalleri's head roll.
Now, don't get me wrong. You have to finish. You have to tighten the D a bit. You have to make sure you are at the top of your game all of the time, not just "a lot" of the time.
But some days, the bounces just don't go your way and there's little you can do about it other than pray to Curry and hope things get better next time.
In closing, good hustle. Things will get better if you just keep pushing and tighten up your game just a touch. We're proud of you, and you will do better next time.
Mwah, mwah. Talk to you later, after we've spoken to a few individuals about what privileges will be taken away should they win again.
Okay, now, Penguins fans. Gather round and listen up.
Sir, that does not look like the Penguins-approved "vegas gold" on your face. We hope you're ready to back up that color choice with fists, if need be. Though we appreciate the selections of MAF and Tanger. Future Lemangs in the making are always heart warming.Anyway, we just had a short talk with the boys and we thought we'd come out and say some words to you, too.
We know no one is too distraught over this loss. We played well and just got some bad bounces, right? It's just the Habs, right?
Well, right, but also very, very wrong.
As Penguins fans, we aren't used to facing the underdog. But think about it; the Habs are rocking a small fairy-tale situation here. Knocking out the Caps and the Pens would be basically the most amazing thing that the Habs could do. Almost like the 2008 Penguins reaching the Stanley Cup Finals.
Like the 2009 Penguins winning the Cup.
Now, of course, the Habs are nothing like the Penguins. But don't you ever forget underdog appeal. Shocking, yes, but we are no longer the underdog.
We're obviously going to win the Cup and we can never lose sight of that, but we can never start thinking that it is just going to be handed to us.
Watching the guys play a game like they just did and lose to the Habs should be an awakening to this fact.
So, wipe that frown off your face, little man, but don't start smiling just yet. Let's get a determined look on that face and head into this like any other battle.
Thank you, and goodnight.
Now, for you, press. We really do appreciate such hilarious photos as this:
It's funny, cute, and nostalgic all at once. Very similar to the famed Gill v. Chad Larose photo.Stop puffing out your chest there, press. We'd like to have a word with you about such atrocities as this:
WHO DID YOU THINK LOOKED GOOD IN THIS PHOTO.You can take the photo, but you do not have to release it to the general public.
It is playoffs time. The players should be worried about playing gracefully and with determination, not focusing on making sure you don't get the wrong shot.
General rule of thumb; If they'd untag it on facebook, don't publish it.
Thank you.
And you...you sir...
On Tuesday, we're getting out the scissors to snip the thin thread from which you hang.Be afraid.
Be very afraid.
Go Pens.
